That’s how many days have passed since my last post (excluding the Top 5).
That’s also how many days it has taken my life to completely flip upside down, back side front in all the right, necessary ways.
I’m feeling so much better than I did since that hopeful leap day. I got out of a bad situation. I took a risk and embraced much needed change. I’ve finally been able to travel and devote more time to the things that matter most.
Writing is one of those things. It’s hard to write when you aren’t consistently reading or writing. One informs the other and the process is organic, less like pulling teeth. It’s hard to do either when you’re plain old unhappy. When your mind and heart aren’t aligned and you can’t get the voices of discontent in your head to shut the hell up.
I’ve been journaling since I could first hold a pencil, and have kept an online journal since Sunday, November 26, 2000(!), so this hiatus was a first for me. I wasn’t procrastinating and I wasn’t being lazy. I was completely and utterly uninspired, and it wasn’t something I felt like documenting. I’d like to think I didn’t want to remember what I was going through. Sure it’s a learning experience, but who wants to hear a sad broken record? When years pass I’m sure I will look back on this rough patch and wonder how I got through it all. I don’t need to relieve the sour details. All that matters is I was strong enough to get through it once, and I can do it again if I absolutely need to (but hopefully never do!).
So on to happier times for this gal. I’m excited to feel as good as I did toward the end of 2009, when anything and everything felt possible. Not much has changed, except the way I approach tackling the seemingly impossible. Life keeps trying to break me down. I can’t help but wonder what it’s preparing me for. Only one way to find out!